Deathstalker (2025): A Review+
This past Sunday we made a last-minute change of plans and decided to see the new Deathstalker movie on a whim. I went into the movie with no expectations, as I’d only seen the original and hated it, but I thought the trailer looked neat. I knew it was directed by Steven Kostanski, who directed Psycho Goreman; I never got around to watching that, but it had a generally positive reception online (in my corner of freak movie watchers anyway). I’ll tell you what: I will be watching Psycho Goreman now.
The poster caught my attention, the movie made good on it.
The whole thing is a blast. From its first moment the film is drenched in buckets of blood from practical gore effects, with bodies and heads getting ripped apart as we’re introduced to an evil army rampaging across a fantasy kingdom: the Dreadites. Experienced film watchers may be thinking “hey weren’t the things trapped in the Necronomicon in Evil Dead called Deadites? That sounds pretty similar.” And they would be correct. This movie has a number of influences, but the Evil Dead trilogy looms largest. From the practical effects beasties appearing in nearly every scene to the gallons of fake blood, Sam Raimi’s legacy of DIY horror lives on in this film. Despite the obvious influence, (and the similarity of bad guy names), none of it ever feels derivative. The titular Deathstalker has very little in common with Ash, being more stoic than quippy. He’s a guy who just wants to steal enough to get by and live another day.
Right at the top I’m going to rave about the strongest and best part of the movie: the beasties. This movie is absolutely full to bursting with some of the coolest practical monsters I’ve seen in ages. Influences are all over the place from Power Rangers and Buffy the Vampire Slayer to the previously mentioned Evil Dead to the many masterful works of Tom Savini, it’s all great. I love the horrific swamp boys, the Zelda inspired bat that’s a giant monster eyeball with wings, the giant magic stone robot fueled by green goop, the two-headed troll at the start, and the weird giant brain headed tentacle guys. That’s like less than half of the entries on the list I made of every practical effects monster I could remember! They all rule, and they are the heart of this movie.
Look at this freak! He didn't even make my top 5!
The plot is aggressively stripped down, being generic in a way that loops around to being perfect. There is no attempt at tricking the audience, no twists, no genre subversions – this is a movie that is using genre the way it is historically understood to function as a tool. You see a guy with a sword on the poster, you expect a hero’s quest to defeat an ancient evil rising again, and maybe there’s a magic sword involved? Bang, you got it. That might sound underwhelming, but here it functions perfectly as the skeleton that supports the movie’s charms: big practical effects monsters, blood and gore, and light comedy that always comes from the characters and never from undermining the premise (no instances of “well that just happened”, thank god).
Every scene has a clean and effective purpose, and they flow cleanly from one to the next. The development of the characters is similar: their relationships and dynamics are established effectively and everything that’s set up is built upon straightforwardly. None of this is groundbreaking, in fact it’s all extremely straightforward, but the construction is so solid and clean that it ends up being a perfect scaffold for the movie as a whole. All the performances are pitched just right, but Daniel Bernhardt in particular is great as Deathstalker. He’s hitting just the right kind of earnestness, not trying too hard to “act”, not being overly serious, but always treating the world as “real” and respecting the tone that’s being set. He’s not grimdark and he’s not treating the world like it’s a joke. He’s a real character in the world doing his best, with just a hint of an action hero wink.
Deathstalker with his companion Doodad (voiced by Patton Oswalt). He's delightfully carried on Deathstalker's back for much of the film, like Luke training with Yoda.
Speaking of the film’s tone, this is a good way to sum up my reaction to the film as whole: I saw someone online call the film “a dry parody” because of the way it takes its silliness at face value throughout. I thought about that for a minute and ultimately decided, no, I think the movie is just silly. This is a movie where the ultimate weapon is a sword made out of four different swords stuck together. When Deathstalker first sees it, he says with all sincerity, “It’s beautiful…the ultimate weapon…”
That’s REALLY FUNNY! But do moments like that make the film a parody? I don’t think so. There’s an art to this kind of tone, to be sure. Can you make a film willing to be over the top and fun without undermining the movie itself (becoming parodic)? Is Gremlins a parody? I don’t think so (Gremlins 2, I’ll grant you). Maybe I’m splitting hairs, but I think distinguishing between a movie being sincere but silly and being a parody is important. As audience members we can’t be afraid to live in the frictional space where silliness and sincerity overlap.
I have to be honest, I was a little afraid to give the movie a 5 on letterboxd, not because I’m precious about my star ratings (obviously not – I gave Deathstalker [2025] a 5), but because I don’t want to give people elevated expectations. What I like so much about the movie is not that it’s mind-blowing or reinventing the wheel. The film has a skeleton of tried-and-true genre staples executed solidly, and then infuses it with independent horror goop and gore, practical effects out the wazoo, and takes itself just the right amount of seriously. Go in looking to have a good time, and you’ll find one.
If you want to see a movie based on seeing this image, you'll enjoy Deathstalker.
Blogs posts of the week:
10 Marlinko Townies to Annoy Your Party With:
Chris Kutalik's Hill Cantons is one of my favorite OSR settings, and this is a delightful little table of weirdos, a Hill Cantons speciality.
A review of The Golden Peaches of Samarkand:
False Machine reviews The Golden Peaches of Samarkand, a book detailing the unusual imports given as gifts to the Emperor during the T’ang Dynasty. The blog post really sells the book as a fascinating artifact in its own right – I’m already investigating tracking down a copy.
The Monster Economy:
Forlorn Encystment catalogues all the instances where the Monster Manual puts monetary values for selling monsters and their parts in thorough and entertaining fashion.